how did i get here?

my husband, my beautiful Dragon, died suddenly at 12:03 AM on 9 February 2009. there was a cold, lovely full moon and 3 feet of snow on the ground. i "slept" for the following 10 months and "woke" to the physical and emotional pain and torments of deep grief. i "woke" to find i had moved the day of his funeral and that i am lost. i am looking for me while i figure out the abstract, unanswerable questions that follow behind any death. my art has evolved. his death changed that as well because i am forever changed and will forever bear the mark of losing the only man i can ever love.
there is alive and there is dead and there is a place in between. i am here wholly in my heart for my children, but i feel empty inside at this time. i miss him. i have not gotten very far in my grief journey. i make no apologies for this.
this is my place, my blog, where i write to tell the universe that i am still here.

Thursday, September 23, 2010

a new widow for all of us to support, please.

i write for an online magazine and through that, have met a fairly new widow. Cathy. it has been just a little over 8 months for her. she and i email each other pretty much every day and i wanted to help her gain the support of others. her site is:


i hope whoever reads this will follow the link to her site and start to follow her, and give her your love and awareness that she has people who understand what she is going through.

thank you all for being out there for those who need you; i being one of them.

peace to you all.
Posted by abandonedsouls at 8:27 AM
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2 comments:

Judy said...

I was thinking today that grief should follow a normal progression--ahead, but instead, it just keeps going in a circle--back to where it all began.

September 23, 2010 at 6:37 PM
abandonedsouls said...

yeah, it does go in a kind of circle, for me it does. definitely not a ladder or a set of stairs where i pass by a tough day and never see it again. my mind has me revisit old hurts. sometimes the memories are wonderful to think about and sometimes they remind me how much i miss him.

September 23, 2010 at 6:58 PM

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