the tinnitus is a little better. the dizziness is abating. the pain in my ear is gone, finally. three nights and two days of spinning rooms and short dog walks in a whirling world but i am better. i feel wiped out. i've been working on one of the quilts i've been commissioned to do. i had the interruption of my daughter's wedding one weekend and then three days of being quite sick immediately after. so with my ear thing i was not going to go lay down again. i need to finish this.
and it's turned into an altogether unique quilt. i finished the top and started piecing the back but i couldn't imagine quilting the front TO the back so i quilted the front on it's own. today i'm finishing the back and will pin it to the batting and a sheet to put in the frame. when it's finished, it will be a double-sided quilt. the top and the back will be dedicated individually to honor her husband's clothes.
i can't explain it. it is just what i felt from knowing her and the feeling i got when i was alone with the basket of clothes talking to him. "what do you want her to have?" it's the only question i ask out loud in my apartment while i work. they are as individual as grief, as the relationship of the two people personally involved with the quilt, and as i am.
hopefully i won't lift my head from the table and be too dizzy anymore. i want this ear thing completely over with. but i think i will nap a little bit today to try and gain a foothold. i'm just down right now. feeling sad and ill and missing my Dragon. wishing my nap was in his arms.
